hidden hit counter <body> ~Byu~ *我的心情加油站*
Name:
Location: Singapore

I WILL live up to the promise of not living my life in mundanity and it will have to first start from within. Otherwise no matter how colorful your life is on the outside, your life will still be bland. ~ byu

...Moi

~Bon~

Unconventional, loyal and a cancerian. I especially like to converse with people who are unrestrainably funny, people with a witty to almost sarcastic sense of humour or people who lead you to reflect deeply. Am stubbornly passive, frog-in-a-well but once I’m into you? Hehe… that’s a different story altogether…

...Mes Liens Personnels

My Friendster Blog
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My IMVU Acct ~ Amibyu
INFJ




And oh! Though this is not my own profile, the way she's described herself kinda reminded me of myself. She's in her 50s. Wonder how wld i be like by then?

Nalora

Perhaps this aspect of my horoscope explains it the best:

Retrograde Venus: has unique ideas regarding pleasure, beauty & love, & less concern for the social amenities. They tend to put those they love to the acid test: “If I do x & y, will you still love me?” Can lead to some form of antisocial behavior.

Don't they sound very much like me?? Perception, perception, perception. It's not for me to judge anyway. Bah!

...THRASH IT OUT HERE





...RANd0m qUoteS

不知道是不是因为换季了,我觉得自己变了很多。我的观察力强了,开始注意些我平常不会注意的事情。

我开始怀疑,梦游是不是会传染的?

...mUzIC RANd0m

♪♫ 用眼神将我淹没 ♫♪
♪ 你是真的爱我吗 ♫
♫ 全心全意 ♪
♫ 现在拥抱我 ♪
♪ 深情不露 ♫


~*~+起起伏伏的感动+~*~

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...RECENT POSTS

  • Mercs Bro
  • The Agony of Life & Feelings
  • Stabirabi rapstastabira
  • Falling Rain
  • Reflection over the past days - Presence
  • 没人要我,你相信吗?
  • Solo performance
  • doubts
  • The Pursuit of Happyness
  • Let it come, let it go
  • ...ARCHIVES

  • January 2007
  • February 2007
  • March 2007
  • June 2007
  • October 2007
  • February 2008
  • May 2008
  • July 2008
  • August 2008
  • September 2008
  • October 2008
  • November 2008
  • December 2008
  • April 2009
  • September 2013
  • March 2014
  • April 2014
  • May 2014
  • July 2014

  • ...MiSSiOn PoSSiBLe


  • Learn Sign Language
  • Establish a Jogging Routine
  • Take up Swimming all over again
  • Get My Car License
  • A Place I Call Home *for good*
  • Delve into astrology/astronomy
  • Take up dancing
  • To have someone whom I can depend on, to take care of me like a baby when I am sick


    ...What is a World Without Dreams??


  • To be a Psychologist

  • To create Singapore's very own inspiring animated heroes

    ~ to be either projected into a cartoon

    ~ or as online characters


  • To Inspire the people around me and to impact the education system


    My Photo - 1| 2


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  • Tuesday, March 20, 2007

    Tuesday

    "Sometimes you cannot believe what you see, you have to believe what you feel. And if you are ever going to have other people trust you, you must feel that you can trust them, too - even when you are in the dark. Even when you're falling."



    "Mitch, it's funny," he said. "I'm an independent person, so my inclination was to fight all of this - being helped from car, having someone else dress me. I felt a little ashamed, because our culture tells us we should be ashamed if we can't wipe our own behind. But then I figured, Forget what the culture says. I have ignored the culture much of my life. I am not going to be ashamed. What's the big deal?



    "Wherever I went in my life, I met people wanting to gobble up something new. Gobble up a new car. Gobble up a new piece of property. Gobble up the latest toy. And then they wanted to tell you about it. 'Guess what I got? Guess what I got?'

    "You know how I always interpreted that? These were people so hungry for love that they were accepting substitutes. They were embracing material things and expecting a sort of hug back. But it never works. You can't substitute material things for love or for gentleness or for tenderness or for a sense of comradeship.

    "There's a big confusion in this country over what we want versus what we need," Morrie said. "You need food, you want a chocolate sundae. You have to be honest with yourself. You don't need the latest sports car, you don't need the biggest house.

    "The truth is, you don't get satisfaction from those things. You know what really gives you satisfaction?"

    What?

    "Offering others what you have to give."



    "Mitch, if you're trying to show off for people at the top, forget it. They will look down at you anyhow. And if you're trying to show off for people at the bottom, forget it. They will only envy you. Status will get you nowhere. Only an open heart will allow you to float equally between everyone."

    He paused, then looked at me. "I'm dying, right?"

    Yes.

    "Why do you think it's so important for me to hear other people's problem? Don't I have enough pain and suffering of my own?

    "Of course I do. But giving to other people is what makes me feel alive. Not my car or my house. Not what I look like in the mirror. When I give my time, when I can make someone smile after they were feeling sad, it's as close to healthy as I ever feel."



    "Each night, when I go to sleep, I die. And the next morning, when I wake up, I am reborn"

    - Mahatma Gandhi



    Morrie chuckled. "Maybe. But, Mitch, all this talk that we're doing? Do you ever hear my voice sometimes when you're back home? When you're all alone? Maybe on the plane? Maybe in your car?"

    Yes, I admitted.

    "Then you will not forget me after I'm gone. Think of my voice and I'll be there."



    "Okay. The story is about a little wave, bobbing along in the ocean, having a grand old time. He's enjoying the wind and the fresh air - until he notices the other waves in front of him, crashing against the shore.

    " 'My God, this is terrible,' the wave says. 'Look what's going to happen to me!'

    "Then along comes another wave. It sees the first wave, looking grim, and it says to him, 'Why do you look so sad?'

    "The first wave says, 'You don't understand! We're all going to crash! All of us waves are going to be nothing! Isn't it terrible?'

    "The second wave says, 'No, you don't understand. You're not a wave, you're part of the ocean' "



    Dedicated to all my dearest friends.
    From the book "Tuesdays with Morrie".
    Author, Mitch Albom.

    Labels:

    Truly Bon;

    Thursday, March 15, 2007

    Venus

    I'm glad that you're always there for me,
    whenever i look to the sky.






    Whether it's late at night
    or wee hours in the morning,
    as i'm walking down
    along those dimly-lit pathways
    My anticipated miracle.

    As i look up each time
    magically, you're up there
    As always.
    You never fail.

    The most brilliant of all "stars"
    Your bright torching yellow glow
    beckoned invitation
    to fixated flaming passion
    Yet still
    so alluringly gentle altogether
    Smiling softly down at meh.
    You give me hope,
    You light up my dark.

    You're my constant.
    You've been the most devoted
    amidst all the upheavals
    and uncertainties
    in my life.

    You've given me strength to continue,
    you've made me smile,
    you've warmed my heart.

    Ahh... my Venus
    Be there for me always.

    Be my eternity.

    ~ Bon











    Early Morning Venus...


    When dawn new pales
    with horizon gold
    scarved in dappled grey,
    and calmly brilliant Venus
    timeless holds on high
    in stillness everlasting,
    I feel a faint quickening,
    as of lost youth revived
    and beauty-inspired joy
    unscarred by weariness,
    the losing battle with life.

    Larger than the brightest star,
    distant, shining, icy,
    yet warming to my eye's embrace;
    intensely white, resplendent,
    solitary, dominant,
    the brightening morning
    is your domain.
    You reign supreme.
    There is none other like you
    'til the great golden god
    mounts his eastern throne
    and you are vanquished,
    from our sight overthrown,
    by one far greater than you.

    Still, you remain
    my silent, silver queen
    of early morn.

    by Don Gray


    More about Venus ~ my favorite star.

    Labels:

    Truly Bon;

    Monday, March 12, 2007

    Way Back Into LOVE



    Female:
    I've been living with a shadow overhead I've been sleeping with a cloud above my bed
    I've been lonely for so long
    Trapped in the past,
    I just can't seem to move on

    Male:
    I've been hiding all my hopes and dreams away
    Just in case I ever need em again someday
    I've been setting aside time
    To clear a little space in the corners of my mind

    Chorus: [Both]
    All I want to do is find a way back into love
    I can't make it through without a way back into love
    Oh oh oh

    Female:
    I've been watching
    but the stars refuse to shine
    I've been searching
    but I just don't see the signs
    I know that it's out there
    There's got to be something
    for my soul somewhere

    Male:
    I've been looking for someone
    to shed some light
    Not somebody
    just to get me through the night
    I could use some direction
    And I'm open to your suggestions

    Chorus: [Both]
    All I want to do is find a way back into love
    I can't make it through without a way back into love
    And if I open my heart again
    I guess I'm hoping
    you'll be there for me in the end

    Female:
    There are moments when
    I don't know if it's real
    Or if anybody feels the way I feel
    I need inspiration
    Not just another negotiation

    Both:
    All I want to do is find a way back into love
    I can't make it through without a way back into love
    And if I open my heart to you
    I'm hoping you'll show me what to do
    And if you help me to start again
    You know that I'll be there for you in the end



    "A melody is like sex..." begun Drew Barrymore.

    "I so get that!" exclaimed Hugh Grant

    "But then as you get to know the person, that's the lyrics... their story, who they are and their needs."



    ***


    "The best time I've had in the last fifteen years was sitting at that piano with you." said Hugh.

    "That's wonderfully sensitive... especially from a man who wears such tight pants" crooned Drew.

    "It forces all the blood to my heart" agreed Hugh.


    ***


    "I've been sleeping with a clown above my bed... clown is not right, what is that word?" frowned Hugh.

    "It's cloud" corrected Drew."Why would you put a clown in your bed?"

    "Let me tell you but not for the 1st time..." said Hugh.

    Labels: , ,

    Truly Bon;

    Saturday, March 10, 2007

    FOCUS

    Labels:

    Truly Bon;


    TGIF!

    Technically, Friday was yesterday... hello Saturday! And wat's TGIF? Okay, I must admit I hv heard of this term before, but somewhere this year, a friend's messaged me "TGIF blah blah blah". So i asked, "What's TGIF?"

    He replied,"Don't you know? Thank God It's Friday!"

    Haha.. and then i remembered all over again.

    Well... when i was in retail line, Fridays & Saturdays were actually our busiest period. All staff were not allowed to take off on these two days. So Fridays doesn't really matter very much to me then unless you're looking forward to closing a customer during the weekends (esp if big deal). Even right now in my current occupation, Fridays wouldnt hv matter very much to me once I'm in the "all in" mode. I can get busy. I cld get busy. And really very B U S Y.



    Remembering the promise to go "rackey" some shops at Clarke Quay (Central G Mall?) on behalf of one of my ex-colleagues, I headed for Clarke Quay MRT. Location was near to my appointment in the evening at PS anyway. Just then, I saw a figure of someone looking rather familiar. *Gasp* oh gosh! :o Was it you whom I had not seen for almost close to one year already? I dodged a lil cos the figure in question was rather near a pillar and with me ducking to one side, he might not be able to see me fr that angle. Was it you? Then again, it didnt really seem like you, or was it you or not? Hell, why am I so evasive all of a sudden? Ironically, now as I am typing this out, I reminded myself of Sophie in the movie "Music & Lyrics" I was to watch after this incident. She wasnt able to face up to a guy with whom she once had a relationship before but screwed her up big time. "He IS a JERK". Wahahaha... it's such an uncanny coincidence... But, it may not be him larh... anyway, why am I so panicky abt someone I'm so over & done with? I moved on to those shops I had targeted to check out...

    Lotsa new shops just starting out in their own names & new brand from overseas landing their 1st retail shop in Central G (i sup, the mall name at Clarke Quay). There was this particular shop call "The Kiss ~ Couple's" (website: www.thekiss.co.jp) that has particularly piqued my interest. Heard fr the sales personnel there that the shop has its roots back in Japan with about 50 retail shops there in its name. Like the designs there. Most of the jewelry there are in silver. I like silver anyway. What's special is that every jewelry design would come in a pair (one for man & one for the lady; though this concept is not exactly new - there's an area in PS call the "Couple's Lab" with similiar concept) and they've even grouped one corner of the shop dedicated to show-casing the top selling jewelry in Japan from no.1 to no.50! Looking at the different couple's rings and necklaces, I was brought back to this particular memory (allow me to indulge a lil bit in the memory of my past on my blog here) nearing Valentine's Day in the year 2001. Though I was working in a jewelry shop, I didnt hv much spending money to splurge on the diamonds & platinium in my shop (wakakaka). I was thinking of wat to do on Valentine's Day...

    Now, just opposite the retail shop where I worked for was a silver shop. Sometimes, on and off when there weren't much crowd in our shop, some of my colleagues including myself wld pop by to talk to the staff there or to glance thru their designs. I remembered seeing quite some decent looking plain silver rings that i could prolly get to match a set together for a couple's rings. Tsk tsk... well then, wldnt this be rather ordinary & a no brainer to just get a set of rings off the rack? Wld this be Bon? Of cos not! LOL. Kk, wat really got me excited were the extra efforts i wld need to put in to present my gift (you may be thinking that some kinda screws must be loose in me to want to do things in a more challenging way!) Oh well, it aint all that difficult anyway. At that time, I had no idea of his ring finger size. He used to have a ring, but with the additional weight he's piled on, it no longer fit him and wat is a surprise without the surprise element? Sshhh... 不能打草惊蛇哦! Bonnie loves surprises! And hope that the person whom she loves wld be delighted by her little acts of surprise too! So, i didnt even use his old ring as a gauge. Being the very gung-ho Bonnie, she's decided that even if the ring did not fit him, she's made up her mind to get another ring for him anyway. Hence without further hesitation, she's got herself the silver ring in her size and another one in his estimated size (using her right thumb as a guideline). To say truth, usually shops wld allow exchange if sizes dont fit so long as they are in mint condition. But what she needed to do next 's completely rendered this second chance null and void.

    During those times, my ex used to delve into basic conversational Japanese. Up to this date, I still hv no idea of most expressions but one of the easiest for me to rmb then is: ai shiteru. Which translates to "I love you" in Japanese. Putting this and the concept of a couple's rings in my mind, wat do you get??

    Did you know you can get engraving services done for your rings if you were to purchase them at most jewelry shops? Well bingo! What's more, I wld be engraving the rings all by myself! Haha.. actually not quite. The engraving machine that most jewelry shops have, engraves on the inside of the ring. Now, the silver shop has a machine which does engraving on the exterior surface of the ring. Hence, I got the silver shop to engrave a heart shape <3 & "Aiyishitehru" in monotype corsiva fonts on the exterior of the ring. Within the ring itself, I set up to work the following message in Capital italics:
    I LOVE THEE 14 FEBRUARY 2001

    Plus a a decent box fr yours truly shop & done up with ribbons, ta-da! I was all set for Valentine's. Happy Valentine's Day!

    Turned out that the ring size did not fit him anyway.

    I bought him his new ring, did up the new set of engravings for him.







    When i do love, i love freely. What i've given, i gave whole-heartedly. I can be random, wacky, mischievous yet sentimental & traditional





    Anyway, that was then. Since then, designs hv improved by leaps & bounds. So have the prices though xD It's so easy these days to pick up lovely looking rings, necklaces, bracelets etc whatever you name it... Just like it's so easy to dress up a woman with all that accessories, dresses, shoes & make-up. All you need is just a lil more vitamin M.

    Do efforts count anymore?

    I guess they still do, to me. But oddly enough, I've never been really much on the receiving end.



    Labels: ,

    Truly Bon;

    Wednesday, March 7, 2007

    Love me for me

    If I'm at my dimmest,
    Love me the way I am

    Value me
    Honour me

    Give me strength
    Fill me with courage

    Acknowlege me
    even in this pathetic state I am at

    Offer me a hand when I am lost

    for there is no time than now that shows the clearest
    your fair weather friends

    And no time than now to truly demonstrate your faith

    Be here for me even for the split second of my gloom
    And I will be assured of your presence
    thru rain or shine
    ups & downs

    Even when you are not there.

    You dun even have to strive to prove it
    I will believe you
    My trust in you

    Just becos
    it is you.

    This is the time.

    And this is me
    Right now.

    Always,
    True.




    Love me when I least deserve it, because that's when I really need it.

    - Swedish Proverb

    Labels: ,

    Truly Bon;

    Thursday, March 1, 2007

    holy shit!

    Pardon meh... really pardon me.

    How shall I put it? It's like staring right into the mirror in the middle of an eerie night and suddenly seeing your reflection staring right back at you.

    Unbelievable. Game for some occult stuff? Well, whether you believe it or not is entirely up to you...

    Just try this simplest one for a start & you may just be amazed: Love Compatibility

    Do you know your time of birth? If not, let's tentatively put it as 12 noon and take the following tests: Astrology & Horoscope (this is more in depth & provide clearer explanations)

    Look out for the red tab with the title "Astrodienst Free Horoscopes". Click to explore the links underneathe. Perhaps you would like to start off with "Portrait" to gain an understanding of how the different signs under your birth fall in to describe the character call you. Afterwards, fiddle with the rest of the links, not forgetting "Children & Young People" as it describes how you behave, think & feel as a child.

    How are your findings? Pray, tell me ;p

    Labels:

    Truly Bon;