Slimeballs! Sleazers!

Dunno what happen to the newly downloaded blogskin for this blog. The origin laywork just disappear! Just downloaded it not too many days back. Hopefully the creator of this skin will get it up and running soon.

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Saw a tagline on an acquaintance's msn that says: "Gals with surface beauty are like visa card, can overdraft, bought and used everywhere, anytime and have an expiry."

Good grief! I hope she doesn't meant me! This was one lady who had added me on msn after we've communicated thru friendster msg but when I took the iniative to talk to her *not once, not twice but thrice*, there were no reply fr her at all. *I may be just too overly-sensitive & emo here* And of cos there's nth in there that describes me at all! Or erm is there? Wahaha... reminds me of those days while I was newbie working in a jeweler's chain store when some cash went missing. It wasn't me of cos! But the tension during the call back to stay after work late into the night just so to have a discussion of each and everyone's alibi, going thru the security video tape and forming a sacred circle of chairs seating not just your manager but as well as the Operational Manager amg all of us staffs, eyes looking at one another, waiting for the one to 'fess up was just too much for a new-comer then like me to bear. So much so that I felt like screaming then: "Yes I admit! It's me! It's me! I'm the one who did it! IT'S ME!" and then hopefully the ordeal wld stop. Logically, of cos it wldnt and instead of helping, it might just make matters worse. I had to curb myself then for this outburst. I absolutely h8 tension! I hate politics! I h8 pretenders! Oh gosh, never you mind...

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Not again!

It was a friend invite from friendster. The primary picture looked decent enuff. But I went further to check out his profile. Just so tell meh, wld you add anyone with contents in his profile like this?


















I dun think any decent gal wld right? Ok, unless if she's not very observant or THAT gullible perhaps something like me in the past.

Opened up my friendster messages and there was this guy who beseeched me to make friends with him and to add him on msn. K... so I click on his pic to go to his profile and you see these:











certain content has been modified so as to make it more palatable to the general audience; it's like a markdown fr erm an "X" category to erm a M18

Helloooooooooo? Duhz. Nuff said. Wrong target.

And then to go online on msn *usually I dun* to have another insensitive bug fr some other unknown guy trying to get to know me.

To say truth, usually it wld hv been tolerable, but due to the above episodes and another unhappy episode on msn which occurred not too far back, my patience's been overstretched. I'm really abt to snap and bite anytime. Like wat they say, a pic paints a thousand words, so let's just see roughly wat had happened during then. Note that the pink writing denotes me and the black words represent that stupid idiot. Click to open image:




Log 3




Log 5




Log 6

See?

Though essentially this one particular guy didnt do anything wrong *& also in the first place, it was me who wanted to get exposed to as many ppl as possible*, I felt bugged by this guy:







Haha... ok I must admit, it all looked really quite innocent though. But I felt peeved when he kept pestering me to intro myself *look at the last part of this log* after I accepted his friend add on Tagged like as if I hv to because he's fulfilled as if "certain" requirements. Though I must say knowing that he's innocent, i dun just flare up on ppl when they least deserve it so I tried to make as graceful an exit as possible by:







Haha.. like real! Not yet embarked on my excercise regimen though. Oops.

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Well, some of my friends've noticed, I seemed to be quite keen on blogging. So much so that it seemed to reign as mah full time job. Haiz.

Cos I'm so afraid of losing myself. Forgeting my past identity. Of what I may "used to be". Of my every single moment right now when I can still feel. My every single tingle of reckless youth now while I still can afford to be prodigal but soon, i will hv no more. I needa go thru a certain phase before I must take up my new heavy responsibilty. And then I will look back no more, save perhaps on those extremely rare difficult moments when i suddenly find myself all alone with no agenda to fill in mah appt book, when i still hv this luxury of wallowing perhaps in the "what ifs" which radically speaking, i ustand, be it thru personal growth training's or sales workshop's paradigm, it's of no monetary contribution to wealth accumulation, of no worth to rmb at all; i will look back at the once me, hidden and stashed away as if imma shame to be seen in daylight, yet was still very much part of me, once.

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Some other experiences:

Once done some door knocking together with a female colleague. A dubious man opened up his door and we ended up talking abt his r/s with his newly "acquired" Vietnamese wife who was once a pros but "he didnt minded at all" & other stuff along those lines. He kept beckoning us to go into his house to hv a seat. Through the front door though, all i saw were some pink curtains that looked suspiciously like barrier for cubicles *my mind ran wild then*. My colleague and i both shook our head unanimously and instead, tried to invite him down to the nearest coffee shop for kopi or tea. Needless to say, no compromise was made and definitely no deal as well.

Another occasion, I went to an ex-colleague's home to follow up on a certain biz. Her hubby came out to greet me in his boxer shorts showing off his tattoo and all. Afterwards, needless to say, my ex-colleague's pretty pissed abt it *she told me that she was angry wif HIM but u noe, that still pretty much put me on embarrassing grounds* Few days later, I recieved a mms with a pic of a man's crotch in its full "morning glory" view which looked obviously taken from home. My suspicions were directed towards my ex-colleague's spouse.

And yet another occasion, I've had my hopes up high of clinching a deal when all the guy wanna do when meet up is to stare into mah eyes...

Duhz...

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So wat's the fine line? it really gets to me sometimes. Just some times. And then perhaps, no more...